Why Is Breastfeeding So Hard? Expert Tips to Overcome the Most Common Challenges

BY KATIE CLARK, IBCLC

While breastfeeding is natural, it’s not always easy. In fact, research shows that most women face significant challenges, especially during the first few weeks. But understanding why these challenges occur – and how to overcome them – can make all the difference.

As a lactation consultant, I’ve witnessed firsthand how approximately 70% of women encounter breastfeeding difficulties, particularly during the first month (Source: Mother.ly). These challenges can feel overwhelming, but they’re often temporary and manageable with the right support and strategies.

The journey of breastfeeding is unique for every mother-baby pair. What works perfectly for one may not work for another, and that’s completely normal. The key isn’t to aim for perfection but to find what works best for you and your baby.

Common challenges often include difficulties with latching, concerns about milk supply, and physical discomfort. While these issues can be frustrating, understanding that they’re normal parts of the learning process can help reduce anxiety and stress. Both you and your baby are learning something new, and like any new skill, it takes time and practice to master.

Throughout my years supporting breastfeeding mothers, I’ve found that knowledge truly is power. When you understand why certain challenges occur and have practical strategies to address them, what seems impossible today can become manageable tomorrow. This comprehensive guide will walk you through:

  • Why breastfeeding can feel challenging initially
  • The most common obstacles you might face
  • Practical solutions and expert tips for each challenge
  • When and how to seek professional support
  • Strategies for building confidence in your breastfeeding journey

Remember, experiencing difficulties doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong. It’s a normal part of the learning process, and most challenges can be overcome with the right support and information. Whether you’re just starting your breastfeeding journey or facing specific challenges, you’ll find practical, evidence-based solutions in this guide.

Bar chart titled 'Breastfeeding Success Rate & Challenges Statistics' showing four key statistics: 70% experience initial difficulties, 25.4% exclusively breastfeed at 6 months, 50% report insufficient milk supply, and 25% of companies have formal lactation programs. The Breastfeeding Mama logo appears in bottom right.

Why Breastfeeding Can Be Challenging

Understanding why breastfeeding can be challenging helps normalize these difficulties and provides context for overcoming them. Only about 25.4% of women in the United States are breastfeeding exclusively at 6 months (Source: NCBI). This statistic reflects not a lack of effort but rather the complex nature of the breastfeeding journey.

Physical Challenges

The physical aspects of breastfeeding can be particularly demanding. Your body undergoes significant changes while simultaneously learning to produce milk and recover from childbirth.

Hormonal fluctuations are crucial in milk production and can affect various aspects of your breastfeeding journey. These hormonal changes can impact everything from your milk supply to your emotional state, and even affect your menstrual cycle while breastfeeding. Your body is essentially learning a new skill while healing from childbirth, which can be physically demanding.

The learning curve of proper positioning and latching techniques can also create physical strain. Your muscles might feel sore from holding new positions, and your breasts may feel tender as they adjust to their new role. This physical adaptation period is normal but can be challenging to navigate.

Emotional and Mental Challenges

The emotional aspects of breastfeeding often catch many mothers by surprise. I’ve found that while most women prepare for the physical challenges, the emotional journey can be equally demanding. The pressure to provide all your baby’s nutrition can feel overwhelming, especially when facing common breastfeeding questions and concerns.

Sleep deprivation adds another layer of complexity to the emotional challenges. When you feed every few hours around the clock, it’s natural to feel exhausted and emotionally vulnerable. This fatigue can make problem-solving more difficult and amplify feelings of frustration or self-doubt.

Societal and Support Challenges

Modern society presents unique challenges for breastfeeding mothers. As a breastfeeding working mom, you might face additional pressures balancing your feeding schedule with professional responsibilities. Limited maternity leave, lack of private pumping spaces, and rigid work schedules can make maintaining breastfeeding more challenging.

Conflicting advice from well-meaning family members, friends, and even healthcare providers can create confusion and self-doubt. While previous generations might have grown up seeing breastfeeding regularly, many modern mothers lack this exposure and the community support that traditionally helped women navigate breastfeeding challenges.

The learning curve is steep for both mother and baby. Your newborn is learning to coordinate sucking, swallowing, and breathing while you’re learning to read their hunger cues, position them correctly, and manage milk production. This mutual learning process takes time and patience.

Understanding these challenges helps explain why breastfeeding can feel so hard initially. However, recognizing these difficulties as normal parts of the journey rather than personal failures is crucial. Many of these challenges can be overcome with proper support and information, leading to a more positive breastfeeding experience.

Most Common Breastfeeding Challenges and Solutions

Understanding and addressing common breastfeeding challenges is crucial for long-term success. Research shows that about 50% of mothers cite insufficient milk supply as a reason for stopping breastfeeding (Source: NCBI). However, most challenges have solutions when properly identified and addressed.

Latching Issues

A proper breastfeeding latch is fundamental to successful breastfeeding, yet it’s one of the most common challenges new mothers face. When your baby isn’t latching correctly, it can lead to various issues including nipple pain, poor milk transfer, and frustrated feeding sessions.

Signs of a poor latch include:

  • Clicking sounds during feeding
  • Nipple pain that continues throughout the feed
  • Baby frequently slipping off the breast
  • Compressed or misshapen nipples after feeding

To improve latch, try these evidence-based techniques:

First, ensure proper positioning. Your baby’s body should be aligned with their head, and their nose should be level with your nipple before latching. Gently support your breast with your hand, keeping fingers well back from the areola. When baby opens wide, quickly bring them to the breast, aiming your nipple toward the roof of their mouth.

If latching continues to be painful, consider working with a lactation consultant who can observe your technique and provide personalized guidance. Sometimes, underlying issues like tongue-tie may need to be addressed for successful latching.

Milk Supply Concerns

Worries about milk supply are widespread, but it’s important to distinguish between perceived and actual low supply. Learning to recognize the signs of low milk supply can help you determine if there’s a real issue that needs addressing.

For true low supply, these evidence-based strategies can help:

  • Frequent nursing or pumping is crucial for establishing and maintaining milk supply. Your body produces milk based on demand, so the more milk removed, the more your body will produce. Ensure you’re emptying each breast completely before switching sides and that you are feeding on demand.
  • In some situations, all the stimulation in the world won’t fix the problem. Blood work, addressing underlying health issues (such as thyroid problems, anemia, or diabetes) may help support milk supply.
  • Incorporating galactagogues – whether they are medicinal or herbal – may also be beneficial for some moms
  • It’s important to work with a lactation consultant trained in low supply to help you navigate the complex issues surrounding true low supply. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach. My team is trained in low supply and are ready and waiting to help you navigate the issues you might be experiencing – you can request a consult here.

Conversely, oversupply can also be challenging. If you’re experiencing engorgement, learning how to relieve engorged breasts properly is essential for comfort and preventing complications like blocked ducts. Sometimes, oversupply can be due to hormonal imbalances or gut issues, so addressing those problems may be beneficial as well.

Mind map diagram showing adequate milk supply indicators with three main branches: Daily Output (wet diapers, bowel movements, weight gain), Behavioral Signs (alertness, satisfaction, feeding patterns), and Physical Indicators (sucking/swallowing, milk transfer sounds, breast softening). The Breastfeeding Mama logo appears in bottom right.

Pain and Discomfort

While some initial tenderness is normal, persistent pain usually indicates an issue that needs addressing. Understanding the different types of discomfort can help you identify and resolve the underlying cause.

Nipple pain is one of the most common complaints. If you’re experiencing sore nipples while breastfeeding, the first step is to evaluate and correct the latch. Proper positioning and latch technique can prevent most nipple pain.

Blocked ducts can cause localized pain and swelling. Learning how to unclog a blocked milk duct is an essential skill for breastfeeding mothers. Gentle massage, frequent nursing or pumping, and warm compresses can help resolve blocked ducts before they develop into mastitis.

For general breast tenderness, try these comfort measures:

  • Apply cool compresses after feeding to reduce inflammation
  • Ensure proper breast support with a well-fitting nursing bra
  • Use expressed milk or purified lanolin on sore nipples
  • Practice good positioning and latch techniques

If you experience symptoms of mastitis (fever, flu-like symptoms, red and painful breast), contact your healthcare provider promptly or lactation consultant immediately. Antibiotics are often not needed when mastitis is treated promptly. While continuing to breastfeed or pump from the affected breast, you may need antibiotics to clear the infection.

Remember that most pain-related breastfeeding challenges are temporary and can be resolved with proper support and techniques. If you’re experiencing persistent pain, working with a lactation consultant can help identify and address the root cause of the discomfort.

For all these challenges, early intervention is key. Don’t wait until small issues become major obstacles. Seeking help at the first sign of difficulty can prevent many common problems from escalating and help you maintain a positive breastfeeding relationship with your baby.

Getting the Right Support

Professional support and a strong support network are crucial for breastfeeding success. With only 25% of companies offering formal lactation programs (Source: NCBI), being proactive in seeking and building your support system is essential.

When to Seek Professional Help

Many mothers wonder about working with lactation consultants. While you might have heard stories asking why are lactation consultants so mean, most are actually incredibly supportive and can provide invaluable assistance. The key is finding the right professional who matches your needs and communication style.

Signs it’s time to seek professional help:

  • Persistent pain during feeding
  • Baby not gaining weight appropriately
  • Ongoing latching difficulties
  • Recurring blocked ducts or mastitis
  • Significant anxiety about feeding

I always say – it’s never too soon to call a lactation consultant. I would much rather see a mom before an issue gets out of control then her waiting until it gets “bad enough” to call. Having a lactation consultant that you trust and can reach out to can make a world of difference. Our team would love to be there for you!

Finding a breastfeeding friendly pediatrician is also crucial for your support team. They can monitor your baby’s growth, address your breastfeeding questions, and provide evidence-based advice that supports your breastfeeding goals.

Building Your Support System

A comprehensive support system typically includes several key components:

Professional Support: Beyond lactation consultants and pediatricians, consider working with:

  • Postpartum doulas who can provide in-home support
  • Breastfeeding support groups led by qualified facilitators
  • Mental health professionals who specialize in postpartum care

Personal Support Network: Your immediate support system is crucial for day-to-day success. This might include:

Partner support is particularly important. Educate your partner about breastfeeding basics so they can support you effectively. They can help with positioning, ensure you have water and snacks during feeding sessions, and take on other baby care tasks to give you time to focus on breastfeeding.

Family and friends can provide practical support like helping with household tasks, cooking meals, or caring for older children. However, it’s important to set boundaries with well-meaning relatives who might offer outdated or conflicting advice.

Community Support: Connect with other breastfeeding mothers through:

  • Local breastfeeding support groups
  • Online communities moderated by lactation professionals
  • Baby-friendly healthcare facilities

Remember that seeking support isn’t a sign of weakness – it’s a smart strategy for long-term breastfeeding success. The right support can make the difference between giving up when challenges arise and finding solutions that work for you and your baby.

When building your support system, look for people and professionals who:

  • Respect your feeding goals
  • Offer evidence-based advice
  • Make you feel supported rather than judged
  • Recognize that every mother-baby pair is unique

Don’t hesitate to change healthcare providers or seek different support if your current situation isn’t meeting your needs. The right support team should make you feel empowered and capable, not discouraged or inadequate.

Banner image featuring a mother breastfeeding her baby in soft, natural lighting with text 'Empower Your Breastfeeding Journey' and a call-to-action button 'Join Fuss-Free Now.' The image includes The Breastfeeding Mama logo and promotional text about joining their supportive community.

Expert Tips for Overcoming Breastfeeding Challenges

Success in breastfeeding often comes down to preparation and proper technique. Research shows that persistent nipple pain and injury are significant reasons for early weaning, but many of these issues can be prevented with proper preparation and technique (Source: ACOG).

Preparation and Education

Preparing for breastfeeding during pregnancy can significantly improve your chances of success. Here are key preparation strategies I recommend to all expecting mothers:

Education is crucial. Take time to learn about proper positioning and latching techniques before your baby arrives. Understanding what to expect in the first few days and weeks can help you feel more confident and prepared. This includes learning about:

  • Different breastfeeding positions and when to use them
  • Signs of a good latch
  • Normal newborn feeding patterns
  • Signs that feeding is going well

Fuss-Free First Year is the resource I’ve created to help you be prepared for breastfeeding from first latch to last. It’s also a place where you can ask questions in a safe, trusted environment.

Physical preparation is equally important. Consider these practical steps:

Have your breast pump ready and learn how to use it before your baby arrives. If you’re planning to return to work, familiarize yourself with pumping and milk storage guidelines. Understanding how to increase milk supply safely can help you maintain confidence in your ability to provide for your baby.

Daily Management Strategies

As an experienced lactation consultant, I’ve found that implementing these breastfeeding tips for new moms can make a significant difference:

Create a comfortable feeding station. Include:

  • Water bottle within reach
  • Healthy snacks
  • Phone charger
  • Burp cloths
  • Any necessary breastfeeding supplies

Maintaining a healthy breastfeeding diet is crucial for both your milk supply and overall well-being. Focus on nutrient-rich foods and stay well-hydrated. While specific foods aren’t necessary for successful breastfeeding, good nutrition helps support your energy levels and recovery.

Practice good self-care routines:

Rest when your baby rests. While it’s tempting to use this time for household tasks, adequate rest is crucial for milk production and your overall well-being. Accept help from others for household duties when possible.

Pay attention to your positioning and posture during feeding sessions. Use supportive pillows if needed, but be careful not to rely on them too heavily as they can sometimes prevent achieving optimal positioning.

Establish a flexible routine that works for both you and your baby. While strict schedules aren’t recommended for breastfeeding, having a general pattern can help you anticipate feeding times and ensure you’re getting adequate rest.

Prevention strategies for common issues:

Monitor early warning signs of potential problems. Address any discomfort or concerns promptly before they become significant issues. This might include:

  • Adjusting latch at the first sign of discomfort
  • Using breast compression during feeds to ensure efficient milk transfer
  • Varying nursing positions to prevent pressure points
  • Maintaining good breast hygiene to prevent infections

Track your baby’s feeding patterns and output in the early weeks. This can help you identify potential issues early and provide valuable information if you need to consult with a healthcare provider.

Remember that every breastfeeding journey is unique. What works perfectly for one mother-baby pair might not work for another. Be patient with yourself and your baby as you find your rhythm together. The key is to remain flexible and open to adjusting your approach as needed.

Most importantly, celebrate your successes, no matter how small they might seem. Every day of breastfeeding benefits both you and your baby, and every challenge overcome makes you more experienced and confident in your breastfeeding journey.

Frequently Asked Questions

Let’s address some of the most common questions about breastfeeding challenges. Remember that poor milk supply is often due to infrequent feeding or poor techniques rather than an inability to produce milk (Source: Women’s Health).

How do I know if my baby is getting enough milk?

Monitor these key indicators:

  • Adequate wet and dirty diapers (6-8 wet diapers per day after day 5)
  • Consistent weight gain according to pediatric guidelines
  • Alert and active behavior when awake
  • Satisfied behavior after feeds (even if for short periods of time)

If you’re concerned, check these signs of low milk supply and consult with your healthcare provider.

Is it normal for breastfeeding to hurt?

While some initial tenderness is normal in the first few days, persistent pain usually indicates an issue that needs addressing. Pain that continues throughout the feed or doesn’t improve after the first week typically suggests a problem with latch or positioning that can be corrected with proper support.

How do I know if I have mastitis?

Common mastitis symptoms include:

  • Breast tenderness or redness
  • Flu-like symptoms
  • Fever over 101.3°F (38.5°C)
  • Body aches and fatigue

If you suspect mastitis, contact your healthcare provider while continuing to breastfeed or pump from the affected breast.

When should I seek professional help?

Consider consulting a lactation professional if you have any of these breastfeeding questions or concerns:

  • Persistent pain during feeding
  • Baby not gaining weight appropriately
  • Recurring blocked ducts or mastitis
  • Significant anxiety about feeding

How can I increase my milk supply?

To increase breast milk supply, focus on:

  • Frequent nursing or pumping
  • Ensuring proper latch and milk transfer
  • Staying well-hydrated and nourished
  • Getting adequate rest

How long should breastfeeding challenges last?

Most initial challenges improve significantly within the first few weeks with proper support and technique. However, each mother-baby pair is unique, and it’s normal for some aspects of breastfeeding to take longer to master. The key is getting appropriate support early when challenges arise.

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Welcome ToThe Breastfeeding Mama

Hi! I’m Katie Clark – mom of three and International Board Certified Lactation Consultant. Over the past eight years, I’ve dedicated my life to helping thousands of breastfeeding moms around the world overcome their breastfeeding problems and find peace in their journey. I can’t wait to help you!